Changing course

Sometimes you think you are following "the plan." You're going where God is leading you, doing the things you are meant to do, when all of a sudden things just don't work the way you thought they would.

Could it be that you are a step ahead of where God wants you to be? That maybe you have to step back and catch up before moving on?

It's like being a mom. You cook, clean, wash clothes, tote the kids where they need to be and you sometimes ask, "Is this it? Is this all I should be doing?" When in fact it is the greatest, most difficult and rewarding job in the world. Not everyone gets to do it.

Maybe it is what I need to be focusing on instead of wondering "What next?"

Where are you at? Wondering or satisfied?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. carpet cleaner
2. old books
3. invitations
4. envelopes
5. peaches

It's not always easy

My "thing" has always been that I try to "ooze" the light of Christ in all that I do. I think you'll agree with me that it is not always the easiest.

The part of "oozing" that has been so difficult lately has been letting the light of Christ fill my heart for myself. The enemy sneaks in and can extinguish that light in a matter of seconds.

"School is too hard. I'm too old. I'm not good enough. I made a big mistake. I'm not a good enough parent." And the list goes on.

Not only do we need to try and let His light shine in our actions to others, but we need to let His light fill our hearts and souls for ourselves.

I have always had a hard time putting myself first, but I know that God wants us to be happy and fulfilled. Sometimes it takes putting ourselves first so that we can be good to our loved ones.

What are you doing to put yourself first and let Christ's love shine in you?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. sweatshirts
2. scotch tape
3. dogs that dream
4. cold toes
5. invitations

The things we do...

I have to step out of my comfort zone tonight...I have to work the "50/50" at the high school football game.

The band boosters sponsor the 50/50 at home games. A pair of boosters walks around the crowd and sells raffle tickets, $1 each or 6 for $5. The purchaser receives a lollipop for each dollar spent. Right before halftime the winning number is announced and they win half the money collected and the other half goes to the band boosters! Only in small town America can you "gamble" on school property! (It's not "gambling" because each person is "purchasing" a lollipop.)

Ah, small town living... :) Anyway, I am one of the folks walking around tonight selling tickets. The things we do to support our children!

All in the name of love.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. a losing football team (God Bless Them!)

2. my son belonging to a group (Band)

3. a cool breeze

4. music

5. feeling needed and loved

Simple Delights

1. $3.25 breakfast special

2. Friday night high school football (the losing team)

3. sand between little toes

4. the waitress bringing your drink order before you ask

5. homemade popcorn

6. "across town" takes five minutes (with traffic)

7. church steeples

8. hearing the door open "Daddy's home!"

9. brand new pencils

10. Sonic Happy Hour

What are your simple delights today?

Date Night

My hubby and I have reinstated "date night." We have started a new tradition on Sunday nights at 9 pm (after my little one has gone to bed). We go to the Riverbend for a "soak." Our new town is known for its natural hot springs. They are all over town. (Our town, Truth or Consequences, used to be "Hot Springs, NM." The old game show had a contest for a town to change their name, and they did!)

The place we frequent overlooks the Rio Grande. The stars and moon are fantastic! They seem close enough to reach out and grab from the sky. We take this time to relax and reconnect.

The funny thing is, that I find it difficult to slow down. Difficult to relax and getaway (it's only 5 minutes from the kids). Even in a small town, life moves so fast.

Have you stopped to enjoy the loved ones around you?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. 105 degree water
2. the sky
3. the sound of running water
4. brand new fingernail polish
5. Fruit Roll Ups

Feels Like Home

We have been in our new home (the parsonage) for just over a month. I am happy to report that all the boxes are gone! This house is smaller than our previous home, so I was not able to unpack everything. Things like my pretty angels and all of my family pictures. I had to downsize. And you know what I have felt? As if we have lived here for years. Our house truly feels like home.

My second house in Houston was a beautiful 3 bed, 2 1/2 bath, 2 story home. We lived there for over 6 years and it never felt as much like home as the parsonage does.

We have stepped out in faith in outrageous ways in the past 3 years and I believe God is telling us that we are indeed listening and following his call.

It's a wonderful, exciting and humbling feeling to know that you are indeed following Christ.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. downsizing
2. small closets
3. fresh paint
4. black lights
5. peanuts

Language

I have a Bachelor's of Music Education degree. The language of "education" is natural to me. Now that I work in the healthcare industry, the language of "healthcare" has become natural to me as well.

I started seminary last week. My first class in 20 years! The language of theology is not natural to me. I am reading and re-reading the same things over and over again just for basic comprehension! Needless to say, it has humbled me.

But something ugly has resurfaced with a vengence...DOUBT. That doubt can be a killer. It can squeeze the life right out of you. It can make all of the good you have done in your life just disappear within seconds. In times of doubt we have to rely on the Sword of the Spirit - the Word of God. When all else fails, and I feel empty, I go back to Philippians 4:13,

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

It is a piece of the word that speaks a mountain of truth.

What scripture gives you hope? What scripture chases away doubt?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. fantastic colleagues
2. good haircutsw
3. homemade cherry Cokes
4. seeing the Earth from an airplane
5. clouds

I'm so in the right place

Our recent move happened very quickly. Within a two week time period, Joe was offered his appointment and we moved. Two weeks!

I never doubted the move, but this weekend I was assured that we were in the right place.

I took the boys and my mother-in-law (Joe was working an Emmaus walk) to the Balloon Regatta at the lake. We got up early, brought along our coffee and donuts and sat and watched the baloons fill up and take off at sunrise. It was astounding!





Where else in the world could this picture be taken?



I also preached for the first time in our new church. I wasn't nervous, and when I looked out at the congregation, I truly felt like I was at home.

We are so blessed.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. online classes
2. new tablecloths
3. folding chairs
4. lake water
5. love

Losing Yourself

Oozing can be difficult. As a preachers wife, I feel like I am always having to be "on." I office out of our church so I am part of the daily comings and goings of folks as they come in. I am not just working my regular job but I am seen as the pastors wife so there are certain expectations. What I am realizing is that it can be very easy to lose who you are.

I want to be an oozer. I want nothing more than for the light of Christ to shine through all of my actions. Whether I am greeting people on Sunday mornings or cleaning toilets at the church, I want for that light to flow through me. But while you are fulfilling the roles you play everyday, you can lose yourself and the reasons for why you do what you do.

God knows each of us. He knows our hearts. He knows our struggles and our victories.

All we do should be pleasing to the Lord.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. sleeping dogs
2. scotch tape
3. Facebook friends
4. cold fingers
5. webcams

A Little Lost

I have been a little lost. What is next? I've made a new home in our first parsonage, even made some friends, but what is next?

I start my seminary class today (I'm only taking 2 hours this first semester since I've not been in school for 20 years) and I am scared and excited. I want to know more, so here starts the journey.

I know Philippians 4:13 and Jeremiah 29:11, sometimes I just wish I knew what God had in store for me next.

When I think back to when I married Joe and I would dream about my future, it never looked like this! And I thank God that it isn't! I'm sure I gave God a good belly laugh when he saw my "plans for the future." They just were not what was destined for me.

I am so grateful.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. new friends
2. hot tea
3. the changing of the seasons
4. routine
5. new adventures

It's just amazing...

It's just amazing.

Just over a month ago we were robbed. It seems life an eternity has passed. Soon after, we received the call that moved us to T or C (Truth or Consequences) and almost three weeks later, in our new town, we feel as if we have been here forever.

It's just amazing.

We have also been blessed with two new friends, T and B. They are our age (in a retirement community) who are just two of the coolest people we've ever met. I have always believed that God sends us angels while we are here on earth, to help us get through difficult times. And again, here are two of them.

When we moved to Deming, he sent us K and R. We would have been lost without them! Especially since we were living in the mountains with a propane tank, well, and swamp cooler! They called us "Oliver and Lisa!" They have also moved to another town, but we consider them very special and dear friends. My angels in Deming.

It's just amazing. God is amazing.

Think about it...you just may be someone's angel here on earth. Or do you have one? Have you shown them some appreciation? Do they know how much they mean to you? Take the time to celebrate them. Love them. Thank God for them.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. bottled water
2. air freshner
3. menus
4. wood floors
5. angels

Satisfaction

I've never been called to go on a mission trip or to help a youth group build houses. You know what I mean? That form of ministry is not where my gifts are strongest.

This past weekend, along with a couple of new friends at our new church, we remodeled the entry of our church, gave the sanctuary a deep cleaning, decluttered a hallway filled with junky cabinets and cleaned bathrooms.

It was the most rewarding day I've had in a long time.

To stand back and see how your work has made a difference all in the name of the Lord.

In my new role as the pastor's wife, I am seeing things much differently. I feel as if I am working with my husband. It is really exciting. Anything I can do to help our congregation have a closer relationship with God, to worship freely, to hear the message, I am ready for.

"The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." Isaiah 58:11

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. no boxes in my living room!
2. our storage shed
3. pumpkin candles
4. shredders
5. our new friends, B and T

If You Would Have Told Me....

If you would have told me that I could pack a house and move in less than two weeks...I would have told you that you were a nut.

If you would have told me that I could find a caring, loving lady to watch my three year old in a small town (in less than two weeks)...I would not have believed you.

If you would have told me that we would be loved by a new church family as much as our previous church family...I would never even have dreamed it.

If you would have told me that Satan himself would make himself known throughout all of this........well, I had forgotten how he works.

I melted down on Saturday. It all hit me. I had moved. I had moved! Oh, my goodness!

I am so glad things have settled down, many, many, many boxes have been unpacked and my oldest likes his new school.

Thank you for your prayers.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. empty boxes
2. the new Walmart
3. an open kitchen
4. our "new" mattress
5. keeping in touch with friends

Packing.....

Sorry I've not been around. My days are filled with work and my nights with packing. We load up the trucks on Friday so we are down to the wire. I can't believe things are happening so fast! We are really excited.

I'll be back on a more regular basis soon.

Please pray for us to have a successful move.

Blessings!

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. Ibuprofen
2. boxes
3. friends that help with anything and everything
4. rolling chairs
5. new adventures

God is so Good

A week ago my family was robbed and it has literally been a day by day existence for us. It's a horrible thing to experience, and it takes time to come to an understanding of what really happened.

Then, God shows up in an amazing way. My husband received a call (one week after the robbery) and was offered his first position as Pastor to the UMC in Truth or Consequences, NM!
What a blessing! Becoming a Pastor is Joe's dream and why he is in school. We never thought he would get a pastorate before he finished school, but here it is!

He will preach in T or C for the first time on August 16th! We have two weeks to get it in gear and move.

One huge blessing is that we will only be 2 hours away from Albuquerque rather than 3 1/2. This means we can get the boys to the hematologist faster. It will definitely help when we have to get Christian in for weekly visits in September. (I'll talk more about that later).

I hope you will join me in praying for our family as we step out in faith into where God is leading us and to especially pray for our children. It is always hardest on the children.

One of my favorite Psalms says it all:

"The Lord had done great things for us and we are filled with joy." Psalm 126:3

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. my Facebook friends
2. feeling better from a weekend of being horribly sick
3. the prospect of a fresh start
4. my Deming church home
5. boxes

Robbed

I am not in a good place. On our way back from Houston, we stopped to eat in El Paso and our car was broken into. Our laptops and my purse were stolen. It's just a sickening feeling.

You hear of people saying "Oh, you feel so violated." Well, it's true. You don't understand that until it happens to you.

It sounds silly, but when you have your life on your laptop and in your wallet, and you know it's in someone else's hands, it's just creepy. (Even if everything is password protected).

I have a daily calendar from the "Touched By An Angel" series that has a saying from the show for each day. When I picked it up to catch up, the saying read...

"Who you are isn't measured by what's in your wallet, but by what's in your soul."

Isn't that the truth? I mean, no, it's a real pain to close bank accounts, file police reports, and insurance, but at least when you have the resources, you are blessed to be able to replace things.

My prayer is that whomever gets into my laptop will see that Christ was important to its original owner. Maybe they will want to know more about Him.

I know all things happen for reasons unknown to us, I just hope that my things will be a blessing to someone in the end.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. My son's "junker laptop"
2. insurance
3. a night of bowling
4. pizza
5. my family being safe

New Every Morning

A brand, new spiral notebook (because I need another brand, new spiral notebook). A fresh start. A clean slate. It's the notion that nothing bad from your past is taken into account. Today is a new day.

"God's loyal love couldn't have run out,
his merciful love couldn't have dried up.
They're created new every morning.
How great your faithfulness!
I'm sticking with God (I say it over and over).
He's all I've got left!"
Lamentations 3:22-24 The Message

What do we do with a "clean slate?" Do we truly start over every day? I can easily equate this with my never ending self care (do you notice I didn't just say D-I-E-T-?). If my present day ends in overeating or not exercising...there's always tomorrow. Right?

If we are blessed enough to wake up yet another day, then God is not through with us yet. Do we truly use that next day to the best of our ability or do we live in the mistakes of our past? I tend to not let go. I beat myself up and in the bludgeoning I am missing out. Missing out on the best life that God has blessed me with. Missing out on being a blessing not just to myself, but to others. And, being a blessing to Him.

What is holding you back from accepting the gift of a new day filled with grace?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. Origins Ginger Souffle
2. straws
3. former students
4. a great mattress
5. a dead laptop

Comparisons

Comparisons can eat you alive.

As a woman in this day and age, we so often look at the women in the public eye and start to compare ourselves to images that are impossible to attain. Airbrushed images of models, way too skinny women, and way too perfect hair. It never ends.

I know that God loves me the way I am right at this moment. He doesn't make mistakes.

Have you ever been in public and noticed someone who may not be dressed to "your standard" or who was extremely overweight? Or maybe even someone who looked "perfect" and you start to pass judgement?

I caught myself doing that recently. Why is it that we do that? "At least I am thinner than she is.....I would never wear that in public, she looks terrible....How can they dress their children that way?" And the vile words can go on and on.

I think Satan just knows how to get the best of us all the time. He knows our weaknesses and knows where we feel of the least worth.

The truth is, God loves the woman who is extremely overweight...He loves the woman who is scantily dressed with tatoos covering her body...He loves me, the sinner, who feels of little worth and knows when I am criticizing that I am hurting inside.

"Father, God, forgive me for comparing and criticizing. I want to be an oozer and I fall short of the mark daily. I want your love to shine through me in all that I do. I want to have a heart that will give everything up in the name of love and grace. Amen"

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. rain
2. my extra weight
3. stepping "out of the box"
4. family
5. the quiet of a library

Joy

Joy - "the emotion evoked by well being, success or good fortune or by the prospect of possessing what one desires"

Today I experienced an amazing amount of joy through the eyes of my three year old.

We are visiting my mother-in-law in Houston and we took off on an adventure to the Aquarium. We had a wonderful lunch surrounded by large aquariums filled with every kind of fish you could imagine. Our day continued with a train ride, carousel ride, adventure through a shark tank and finished with time in the dancing waters.



I was able to ignore the heat and humidity (I am soooo acclimated to the dry desert), the sweat dripping down my face, the annoying man spraying everyone waiting in line with a water gun and the long lines to see life through the eyes of my little one.




The ant that was crawling on the ground while we were waiting in line, the big, green eel in the fish tank, the excitement of the train whistle...it was joyous! I was able, for the first time in a long time, to ignore the trappings of everyday life and just enjoy the moments.

We get so caught up in doing. Do we stop long enough to enjoy?

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. fish
2. excitement
3. ice cream
4. humidity
5. a cool shower

Me, Myself & Lies

I am working through a great study called "Me, Myself & Lies" by Jennifer Rothschild.

Today's lesson was just hard hitting for me.

Jennifer's whole premise of the book is about builing our "thought closet" to represent the truths we hold of ourselves, not the negatives.

Her example today was great.

"You spot a wad of fabric near a trash can. As you approach, the stench accosts you! Even so, you pick up the nasty fabric and discover it's a woman's blouse. Hmm, you think, I wear blouses! I wouldn't have chosen this one, but here it is...So you hang it by your favorite jeans and think, I don't like this, but it's here, so I guess I'll keep it. Now the whole closet reeks and your clean, lovely clothes get dirty as you shove it in place. It has no value; but now it's yours." (from "Me, Myself & Lies" by Jennifer Rothschild)

Isn't that true of what we think of ourselves? One, stinky, untruth can destroy the library of good things that we think of ourself. "Library of good things?" you say? That's where we have to start. We often find it hard to say good, truthful things of ourselves.

Make a list. "I am....." Don't let the one, ugly thought come in and destroy your words. Don't say, "I am fat, I am ugly, I am not smart."

Remember, God made us the way we are and loves us right at this very moment, the way we are!

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. Bible Study
2. barking dogs
3. renewed passion
4. my hubby not traveling again until September!
5. preparing to send my son to camp